This is so absolutely frustrating!

I have been doing a lot of thinking about this subject this week.  We are moving quickly into the Holiday Season and this brings up a lot of "what do we do" questions.  The boys parents expect them to eat with them on Thanksgiving but have no plans for preparing the dinner. Do we fix it and send it with the boys to their house? Do we just tell them they have other plans?  How do we let the boys know it is their decision and whatever they choose we will stand behind them.

Never did I think I would be dealing with these types of conundrums at this stage of my life. The parents are in bad shape and the recovery is not going well. I feel responsible for them as well as for the boys but it is impossible to take on all of the problems of both families.

My daughter and I are trying to plan for Christmas and to make sure the boys are comfortable and secure.  We can't buy them everything they want and I know they understand but the securing of home and warmth and food is so important to them and I hope they have clarity on the costs of providing these to them.

There is nothing I would not do for them, but I will be the first to admit it is difficult.  I talk to my contemporaries who are traveling and enjoying their empty nest while I spend many days just trying to catch up on the laundry.

This is such an epidemic and is tied to the heroin epidemic in our area and I can see no end to these problems that are being caused by this drug on our society and the children of those who have fallen into the dark pit of addiction.  We are trying to find a way to put Dad into a residential facility for recovery, but all he talks about is that his wife can't be left alone. He is afraid she will kill herself if there is noone there to help her.  The older grandson has the same fear and wants to stay with her if he goes in. This may seem like a great solution, but it puts him back in the center of those who are using drugs and the neighborhood is so bad that I would fear for him.  She won't stay with me because I won't tolerate drugs in our home and there doesn't seem to be any resources to help with all these problems. Putting them both into rehab would be great! We can care for the dog...that is the easy part. If only there was a magical pill to solve all these problems....NOT HEROIN, just a happy solution.

This is enough venting for one day, but I am so frustrated and frightened by this whole issue. My daughter is a rock and helps with the boys and with their parents but she is as unsettled as I on this issue.